Title
We Can't All Be Rattlesnakes - Paperback
by Patrick Jennings (Author)
Crusher the snake will charm readers in this entertaining, funny novel about a snake in captivity and how she turns the tables on her human captor.
I am a snake.
No, not a rattlesnake. I just look like one. I'm a gopher snake.
One day an oily, filthy, fleshy human child crossed my path. As luck would have it, he knew the difference between a gopher snake and a rattlesnake. He has imprisoned me in a terrarium. His name is Gunnar. He calls me Crusher. He thinks I'm male. I'm not.
He dropped in a dead mouse and hoped I'd eat it. I buried it. He then dropped in a live one, which he called "Breakfast." I didn't lay a coil on it.
Gunnar thinks I'll be his adoring pet. He's wrong.
In fact, I am planning my escape. I may take breakfast with me.
Back Jacket
I am a snake.
No, not a rattlesnake. I just look like one. I'm a gopher snake.
One day an oily, filthy, fleshy human child crossed my path. As luck would have it, he knew the difference between a gopher snake and a rattlesnake. He has imprisoned me in a terrarium. His name is Gunnar. He calls me Crusher. He thinks I'm male. I'm not.
He dropped in a dead mouse and hoped I'd eat it. I buried it. He then dropped in a live one, which he called "Breakfast." I didn't lay a coil on it.
Gunnar thinks I'll be his adoring pet. He's wrong.
In fact, I am planning my escape. I may take Breakfast with me.
Crusher will charm readers in this entertaining, clever novel about a snake in captivity and how she turns the tables on her human captor.
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by Patrick Jennings (Author)
Crusher the snake will charm readers in this entertaining, funny novel about a snake in captivity and how she turns the tables on her human captor.
I am a snake.
No, not a rattlesnake. I just look like one. I'm a gopher snake.
One day an oily, filthy, fleshy human child crossed my path. As luck would have it, he knew the difference between a gopher snake and a rattlesnake. He has imprisoned me in a terrarium. His name is Gunnar. He calls me Crusher. He thinks I'm male. I'm not.
He dropped in a dead mouse and hoped I'd eat it. I buried it. He then dropped in a live one, which he called "Breakfast." I didn't lay a coil on it.
Gunnar thinks I'll be his adoring pet. He's wrong.
In fact, I am planning my escape. I may take breakfast with me.
Back Jacket
I am a snake.
No, not a rattlesnake. I just look like one. I'm a gopher snake.
One day an oily, filthy, fleshy human child crossed my path. As luck would have it, he knew the difference between a gopher snake and a rattlesnake. He has imprisoned me in a terrarium. His name is Gunnar. He calls me Crusher. He thinks I'm male. I'm not.
He dropped in a dead mouse and hoped I'd eat it. I buried it. He then dropped in a live one, which he called "Breakfast." I didn't lay a coil on it.
Gunnar thinks I'll be his adoring pet. He's wrong.
In fact, I am planning my escape. I may take Breakfast with me.
Crusher will charm readers in this entertaining, clever novel about a snake in captivity and how she turns the tables on her human captor.
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Shipping & Returns
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We deliver your parcel within 2–3 working days. As soon as your package has left our warehouse, you will receive a confirmation by email. This confirmation contains a tracking number that you can use to find out where your package is.
Returns
We offer free returns within 30 days. All you have to do is fill out the return slip that you received in your package and stick the prepaid label on the package.Please note that it can take 2 weeks for us to process your return. We will do our best to complete this process as soon as possible.
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We provide a 2-year limited warranty, from the date of purchase for all our products.
If you believe you have received a defective product, or are experiencing any problems with your product, please contact us.
This warranty strictly does not cover damages that arose from negligence, misuse, wear and tear, or not in accordance with product instructions (dropping the product, etc.).
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Your payment information is processed securely. We do not store credit card details nor have access to your credit card information.
We accept payments with :
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